…I guess I’m not as heart-healed as I thought.
As I thought about it on the way home tonight from a family gathering, that I’ve lived for five years with my inability to self describe as being a nice person without qualifying it with “try to be”, I suddenly got angry at Caradoc, because it sank in that, in a very real way, he still has had a hold on my life in some small but important way. The depth of the anger surprises me, given the amount of time, but I suppose it was a long time in coming.
So, I have two words now. Fuck. Him. I’m gonna take this back from him, and end what little remnant of his influence on me.